Читать книгу From Me To We - Toni-Marie Taherian - Страница 18

We can change our lives. We can do, have, and be exactly what we wish. – Tony Robbins

First, take into consideration the strength of his effect on you. Desire cannot be faked. Look for someone who makes you uneasy or resembles your deep-rooted childhood ideal. He may represent something forbidden that excites you, maybe he resembles your ideal partner or perhaps you feel elated in his presence.

It is hard to find the right man worth attracting; it requires a combination of both your interests. Once you establish your interest, recognise if he is right for you. Analyze how he is responding to you by seeing if you have an effect on him. If he is not open to your feminine wiles, you need to stop wasting your time. It is impossible to attract every man you can put your finger on, as not everyone is open to your influence.

Many women rush through the process and become too involved too soon, without thinking rationally. When you rush into a relationship, there can be one of two outcomes: you catch him but soon lose interest, or he loses interest and the game is over. In your haste, you lose the chance of knowing if you have met the right person. Give yourself a chance to test the water to see if he is worth your time. It is only when he loses himself in the moment that he is ready to fantasise about you, and his conscience will no longer hold him back.

To attract him, you need to fully understand two things: what makes you attractive to his needs? Is he on par with what you desire? The importance of both these attributes should not be underestimated. If you act in accordance with his needs in ways not aligned with your character, he will see through your manipulations. If you rely only on what is appealing about your personality, you limit your potential. If you do not know much about him you may not use your tools effectively, or worse, use the wrong ones and turn him off completely. To make him fall in love with you, you need to know what arouses the feeling of love within him. Conquer his every thought by reaching to his subconscious and allow him to indulge in his deepest desires. Change his direction and create memorable experiences. Be sure to test him before treading the boards of a new relationship. He has created barriers around his heart; to gain access you need to find ways to penetrate his defences, so he surrenders his heart wilfully.

To dazzle him, see reality for what it is. Step outside your comfort zone. When you meet a man, you need to first get inside his head. Your attention should be taken away from yourself and focused on his mind. Gain information about him so you can devise a plan specific to him. The true key to charm is feeding what has been repressed or denied. What attracts him is your effort, showing how much you care. Leaving things to chance can result in a disaster, as you can make many mistakes.

Falling in love is a matter of psychology. Each relationship is special and intimate in its own way and there are no templates. Therefore, you need to deal with every person differently. Start by getting to grips with who he is. How else can you tell if he is right for you? What works with one guy may not work for another. Remember, people do not all love in the same ways or show they care in the same ways. Never assume that everyone expresses their love in a similar manner.

The man you idealise is more complex than the mask he hides behind, pretending to be more confident than he actually is. Never mistake his appearance for reality. He hides his insecurities and feelings of confusion and emptiness to protect his fragile ego. Appearances are deceptive. Though you may judge him by his face or clothes, never mistake his outward appearance for reality. He may be disguising his true feelings and showing you a reflection of the part of his character with which he is most in tune with. It is impossible to fully understand what is important to him, as he may either be lying to protect himself or even lying to himself.

What is it that motivates and interests him? Information depends on a keen eye for detail and requires digging deeper than the information he provides you. He may not be direct in telling you what he wants, maybe because he is too afraid. At times he will tell you the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, but how can you differentiate between the two? An angry facade may hide that he is dying for warmth. A repressed type may actually be struggling to conceal uncontrollable emotions. A calm exterior may point to a highly emotional and aggressive individual who is putting up a front to hide his insecurities and weaknesses. Men who are outwardly distant or shy are often longing to be drawn out and are easier to catch than extroverts. The greatest void all men feel is the lack of excitement and adventure. If he has repressed his appetite for pleasure, he is an easy target.

Once you understand his psychology, identify what he is looking for. Can you see him as his ideal self? Is the ideal he is searching for a part of your character, or someone you want to be? If the answers to these questions are yes, you can both enjoy a fruitful relationship, with time and patience. If he cannot offer you what you need, move on. There is no point in faking a relationship or pretending to be someone you are not, just to satisfy him.