Читать книгу From Me To We - Toni-Marie Taherian - Страница 8

Do not seek love but instead break the walls you have built against it. – Rumi

If you face life with a closed your heart, you will still feel lonely, even if you live among thousands of people. If you have the courage to open your heart, even when living alone, you will lead a full life.

Some people are single because they panic at the idea of committing themselves to one person. They are afraid of the unknown, or cannot connect due to some internal inability. Where does this fear come from? Early childhood is a critical time in forming a personality and an emotional life, as anything learned at this stage of development is stronger and further resistant to change. The stronger the emotions experienced when the trigger was first learned, the harder it will be to weaken its impact. Emotional signals do not point to their source, so never jump to conclusions. Fear may have many sources; the guilty person’s fear of being caught looks just like the innocent person’s fear of being disbelieved. It is essential to your behaviour to gain greater self-understanding and self-worth, in order to avoid acting out of fear.

Inside every human soul are two opposing forces battling with each other: love and ego. Although both are required for one’s existence, they conflict with each other quite often. This is the point at which you decide what to keep and what to lose. The mind tries to control things due to its fear, and fear keeps you from finding love. To your ego, love seems dangerous, threatening and heartbreaking. It can incite feelings of rejection, conflict and therefore destroy your individuality and independence and resulting in pain. Given that human nature is designed to avoid pain, you or he may subconsciously avoid love.

Love, on the other hand, is associated with feelings of passion and a sense of belonging to another person or thing. Following your heart may at times result in embarrassing or uncomfortable situations. But doing so is not about being comfortable and not about getting approval. It is about achieving your dreams and fantasies. It is about finding and living your life to the full. It is about truly feeling alive and courageous.

Few have been taught by their parents or society to follow one’s heart. The ego is concerned with losing things or people you desire. Therefore, what others think of you becomes important, creating a duality between you and your heart’s true desire. Everything confirms that the world is separate from you. If you are separate, then by definition, it is logical to fear what is not part of you. Once you start to allow yourself to be happy, the moment you accept yourself and your life, that is the time you begin to enjoy what life has to offer.

If you have a hard time taking criticism, if you experience pain, then you have a sensitive ego. Explore the depths of your ego by asking yourself what can push your buttons, hurt you psychologically, trigger anger or provoke a reaction. Do you show off to appear greater than how you feel you are, or do you act shy and timid, hiding behind a stereotype or label? Ego is essentially fear disguised as confidence; it is the voice of distrust. Losing your ego means putting aside what you believe makes you special. Your ego is responsible for protecting you, whether using an aggressive or a defensive approach. It does not allow you to trust your heart, as it requires being in control. The ego is your weaknesses disguised as strength, allowing others to take advantage, making you become the very thing you fear.

If you are indifferent and let go of your ego by seeing reality with your heart and not your head, you can open yourself up to unimaginable possibilities, new strategies and creativity you were previously unable to conceive. This new found freedom can provide you with opportunities for growth, love, harmony, peace and joy.